


What if 13 million people loved you for something you're not?

by firstrealcrush



Category: One Direction (Band)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-09
Updated: 2013-06-09
Packaged: 2017-12-14 11:42:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/836495
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/firstrealcrush/pseuds/firstrealcrush





	What if 13 million people loved you for something you're not?

Harry sat down at his desk. His head fell into his hands and the tears started to fall. He ran his fingers through his hair and sniffled, opening his laptop. It quickly buzzed to life and he went to twitter. He scrolled through his mentions:

_“Harry Date ME! x67”_

_“Harry i love you so much marry me or follow me whichever!!!! x45”_

He sighed and went to twitlonger. His fingers hovered over the keyboard while he decided what to type.

_“Okay, it’s time i say this. It’s been bugging me for awhile. You know i love you all and you know i never want to let you down, and that’s why this has been bugging me so much. I’m not sure how to say it so i’m just going to let it out. I’m not straight. I’m gay. I like boys. You are all so scared for my sexuality, but you don’t need to be. It’s mine, not yours. This might sound egotistical but I know you all want to date me. I know you all want something from me that i can’t give to you. I’ve pretty much locked my heart onto someone already, anyways. Well that came out wrong, i’m not in a relationship. But i am in love.. That doesn’t matter though. I’ve been feeling like none of you even really know who I am. I’ve been hiding my sexuality and that’s a big part of who I am. I’m sorry if i let you guys down. But, how would you feel if 13 million people loved you for someone you’re not? .x”_

Harry hit post and he watched as the tweets poured in.

_“oH MY GOD HARRY WHAT”_

_“I KNEW IT I FUCKING KNEW IT”_

_“NOOOOOOOOOO”_

_“No Harry! No se puede ser gay! Nos íbamos a tener un montón de bebés!”_

He sighed again and wiped a tear from his eye. He went to the twitter homepage and tweeted again.

_“I’m sorry again. Sorry for everything. Just, sorry. Bye .xx”_

He closed his laptop, not wanting to read anything else. He got up and walked to the kitchen, opening the drawer under the toaster and pulling out a pen and paper. He sat down and began to write.

_“To whom it may concern, I’m sorry. I’m sorry i couldn’t stay any longer and i’m sorry that someone had to find me like this. No matter what you think this is none of your faults, it’s only my own. Read the twitlonger i posted, yeh? I hate to be a burden so i’m going to ask you all not to cry. Now,_

_To the boys, It was great while it lasted. You’ve all made me so happy and you really made it worth it to keep going while I did._

_To my mum, dad, Robin and Gemma, you guys really made it a blast growing up and you all accepted me for who i was before any one else did. I’m sorry that I had to go out like this and i hope you aren’t mad at me. I love you.x_

_To Liam, you’ve been a great friend in these few years i’ve known you and you’ve always been there for me to talk to. This one’s just not able to be talked out. I hope things work out well with Danielle.. Tell the kids good things about me. Thanks man .x_

_To Niall, Oh, man. Niall, you’ve been really fun. I’m going to miss you, bro. You’re one of my very best mates. Stay true to who you are, don’t forget where you came from.x_

_To Zayn, haha i’ve said this with each of the other boys too, but you really are one of my best mates and i thank you so much for being there for me, and being there with me the whole journey. Thanks bro, hope things work out with Perrie. Get a tattoo for me? Ha, i’m only joking. You’ve got enough of those already. Love you man .x_

_To Louis, check your phone._

_Once again, i’m sorry. I’m sorry i couldn’t stay any longer and i’m sorry i’ve let you all down. I can’t go on any more though, not with 13 million people loving me for someone i’m not._

_As for my last words, “Never hide yourself from the people that love you the most.”_

_Peace out.xx”_

  
He put the pen away and ripped the paper from the notepad. He walked to the bathroom, and taped the note on the door, closing it all the way. He reached into the cupboard and pulled out a container of pills, full. He shoved his hand into his back pocket to find his phone and began typing a message.

_“Louis i know you’re out with Eleanor and you won’t see this until tomorrow but i need to tell you now before it’s too late. I’m in love with you. I have been since the beginning. You’re everything i’ve ever wanted, Louis. I love you, so, so much. Goodbye baby .xx”_

He hit send and set his phone on the counter, opening the bottle of pills. He took out 10 and shoved them in his mouth, swallowing hard. His phone vibrated.

_“Harry? What are you talking about? We’re only friends..”_

He laughed at himself for crying.

_“I know Louis, we’re only friends and that’s all we’ll ever be. I’ve got to leave now. Just remember, I love you.”_

He sat his phone down, picking out 10 more pills and tipping his head back to swallow them all.His phone vibrated again.

_“Harry what the fuck are you talking about? You said you were staying home tonight. You don’t even have a car to leave in. Are you drunk? Stop being stupid.”_

Harry’s breath caught in his throat. He hadn’t really expected a reply from Louis, let alone a rude one. He took the rest of the pills in the bottle and chugged them all. He reached into the cabinet under the sink, finding a full bottle of Jack Daniels that he’d placed there last week, while planning this. He popped the cap off and placed the opening to his lips, swallowing quickly. He closed his eyes and leaned back against the bathtub. He sat in silence until the bottle fell from his hands and rolled across the floor.


End file.
